Category archive: Humour

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Latest Funny video: Don’t Let me down!! You will love it!!

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Published on:
June 7, 2013 3:12 pm
Author:
admin

Admiral Lord Nelson…..great laugh!!!

    Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."   Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."   Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?"   Hardy: "Sorry sir?"   Nelson (reading aloud): "' England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion

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Published on:
June 4, 2013 4:35 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Naughty Ones

Year’s best comeback!

      If you ever testify in a Court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defence attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credibility …..      Q: 'Officer — did you see my client fleeing the

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 3:36 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

Marketing concepts made easy…………….

      A Professor explaining marketing concepts to the Students :-     1.       You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" – That's Direct Marketing    2.       You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 11:12 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

Must Read for fun!

    Statutory warning: I am not responsible for the damage done to your mental health, your social relationships, your image among peers or your job by reading this mail. Those with blood pressure, please avoid. But never mind read only once…The effects are cumulative!!   Q: Why is an elephant big, grey, and wrinkly?

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 10:37 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

THE GOLF NUT…. GREAT ONE!

    GOLF NUT  John and Helen met while on vacation, and John fell head over heels  in   love with her. And after a couple of weeks in which John took Helen  out  that it was true love.     So…..on the last night of his vacation, the two of them went to dinner and had

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 9:14 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

Neil Armstrong’s Secret!!!

  Neil Armstrong's Secret    On 20th July 1969, as commander of the Apollo11 Lunar Module, Neil Armstrong was the first person to set foot on the moon. His first words after stepping on the moon 'Thats one small step for man, One giant leap for the mankind,' were televised to Earth and heard by

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 8:19 am
Author:
admin

A real naughty laugh!!

    A man checks into his hotel on a business trip and, feeling a bit lonely, he thought he'd call one of those girls advertised in phone booths when calling for a cab.   He looked in a phone booth near the hotel and found an ad for a girl calling herself Veronique, a

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 6:12 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Naughty Ones

Dog’s Life

   

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Published on:
June 3, 2013 5:43 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

Intelligent Word-Play!

  1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4.

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Published on:
June 2, 2013 2:03 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

How Come Women are never depressed?…..!! Seriously!

      From a Woman in reply to Why men are never depressed:   Women can talk to attractive members of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.   A woman can never be blamed if it's wet on the floor around the toilet bowl.   If a woman cheats on her

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Published on:
June 2, 2013 8:19 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

Tax System explained in beer

  Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this: The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing. The fifth would pay $1. The sixth would pay

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Published on:
June 2, 2013 3:06 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

Love the Irish..!

    Love the Irish     McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar.   When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave,  "S'cuse me", said a customer, who was puzzled over what

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Published on:
May 9, 2013 5:23 pm
Author:
mailman

Very Good One for Laughs!!!!!

    A married couple met a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny.    So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.  However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable

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Published on:
April 30, 2013 1:47 am
Author:
admin
Categories:
Humour, Naughty Ones

WIFE FROM HELL…..!

  A Husband and wife had been arguing, when the husband , did not realize he was driving a bit to fast, was pulled over by a police officer for speeding  The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.'  The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruise control

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Laws of Delhi!

    Laws of Delhi:   1. If my side of the road has a traffic jam, then I can start driving on the wrong side of the road, and all incoming cars will be re-routed via Meerut . 2. The Queue Nahin Rule:  If there is a queue of many people, no one will

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Published on:
April 28, 2013 5:53 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

SKIRT ZIPPER

SKIRT ZIPPER – this is HILARIOUS!   As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus

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Published on:
April 27, 2013 1:57 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Naughty Ones

The Irish….We all love em!

  The Irish…   Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O’Leary’s apartment when Paddy Murphy loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest, and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue playing standing up.

Michael O’Connor looks around and asks, ‘Oh, me boys, someone’s got to

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Published on:
April 27, 2013 12:26 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Naughty Ones

She makes us proud!!

  A SENIOR MOMENT – I HOPE I HAVE THEM LIKE THIS!! A 98 year old woman in the UK wrote this to her bank.The bank manager thought it sufficiently amusing have it published in the Times. Lets hope he also did the right thing by his customer.    Dear Sir,   I am writing

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Published on:
April 24, 2013 2:20 am
Author:
admin
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

The art of “working out”. Literally!!

        The art of "working out"   So here's a program of strenuous activities that does not require much physical exercise.   01) Beating around the bush   02) Jumping to conclusions   03) Climbing the walls   04) Swallowing your pride   05) Passing the buck   06) Throwing your weight

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Published on:
April 23, 2013 4:25 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous, Trivia

GOLFERS!

      A man and his wife walked into a dentist's office.   The man said to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one heck of a hurry.  I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf, so forget about the anesthetic, I don't have time for the

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Published on:
April 23, 2013 2:09 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

Best Lawyer Story of the Year

      BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE AND PROBABLY THE CENTURY   Charlotte, North Carolina. A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against, among other things, fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even

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Published on:
April 19, 2013 2:13 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Story Time!, Trivia

Divorce Letter – Brilliant !!

Dear Wife,     I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for  seven years and I have nothing to show for it.  These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and

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Car keys – really good one for laughs!!!

    The older I get, the better I was.   Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church,  I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down.   I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets.   A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.  

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Published on:
April 17, 2013 10:19 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

Politically correct

  The problem with political jokes Is they get elected.               ~Henry Cate,VII We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.                 ~Aesop If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches there wouldn't be

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Published on:
April 17, 2013 10:16 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

Who all agree?

This one is just too good and so true. All girls would agree. A SPANISH teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English,  nouns are designated as either masculine or  feminine. House' for  instance, is feminine: 'la casa.' 'Pencil,'  however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.' A student asked, 'What gender  is 'computer'?' Instead

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Published on:
April 15, 2013 3:16 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

How to tell the sex of a fly? .

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.   "What are you doing?" She asked.   "Hunting Flies" He responded.   "Oh. ! Killed any so far ??" She asked.   "Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.     Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell

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Published on:
April 15, 2013 12:56 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Trivia

Evening Classes for Men!

    WOMEN’S INSTITUTE OF THE WORLD Is proud to announce the opening of its   EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN! OPEN TO MEN ONLY ALL ARE WELCOME   Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants   The course covers two days, and topics covered

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Published on:
April 13, 2013 2:49 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous, Trivia

Parsi Surnames

    While most surnames in India reflect caste and lineage, the Parsis had a delightfully modern streak  having landed without caste, history and context, they created identities through professions and urban streets.   Our family moved to Bombay (now Mumbai) from Rawalpindi in 1947. We came as refugees but the family soon settled and

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GOODBYE MOM!

  Hope this touches you the way it touched me!     A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.         She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and

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Published on:
April 13, 2013 2:46 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED?

    WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED?   Men Are Just Happier People –   What do you expect from such simple creatures?   Your last name stays put.   The garage is all yours.   Wedding plans take care of themselves.   Chocolate is just another snack…   You can be President.   You

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Published on:
April 9, 2013 9:56 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous, Trivia

Indian Moms are great!

    This is the story of an Indian MOM. Mom comes to visit her son Kumar for dinner……. who lives with a girl roommate Sunita. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Kumar's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and

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Published on:
April 9, 2013 1:09 am
Author:
mailman

Snap taken in a Wedding!

Couldn't have been more explicit!           

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Published on:
April 9, 2013 1:07 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

Interpreting your banker’s advice – Sound Advice!

        Let us see what your banker says…..and how you should interpret it…   It is not easy being a layman today! The amount of 'advise' that is dumped on you is stunning. Advise on where to travel, when to travel, how to reduce weight, how to impress your girlfriend / wife

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Published on:
April 8, 2013 4:13 am
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous, Trivia

Two Doctors…good one!

  The Psychiatrist and Proctologist          Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading:  "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors."     The town council was not happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to read, "Schizoids

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Published on:
April 2, 2013 4:24 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

LESSONS!!

    LESSON ONE  A young executive was leaving the office at 6 p.m. when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.  "Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"  "Certainly," said the

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Published on:
April 2, 2013 3:48 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

I love this Doctor …for laughs!

  I love this Doctor!   Q: Doctor, I've heard that  cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?  A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it… Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car

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Published on:
April 2, 2013 12:52 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour, Miscellaneous

The Dead Parrot and THE Golfer…as always!

          The Dead Parrot     At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto,  the caretaker at your country house."   "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"     "Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your

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Published on:
March 27, 2013 4:45 am
Author:
mailman

A BOTTLE OF WINE.. For laughs!

  A touching story all women will adore…!        For all of us who are married, were married, wish we were married, or wish we weren't married, this is something to smile about the next time you see a bottle of wine….. Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern

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Published on:
March 26, 2013 4:48 pm
Author:
mailman
Categories:
Humour
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