VENUS OR MARS

By on October 19, 2017, in Miscellaneous

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with 
their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, “I don’t 
feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”
I said, “WHAT??!! What was that?!”

 So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…

“You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.”

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me 
for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time 
with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,
big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried
on several different very expensive outfits.

She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy
them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I
said, “Lets get a pair for each outfit.”
 
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she 
was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she
doesn’t even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She 
was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, “I think this is
all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t
feel like it.”

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
“WHAT?” 

I then said, “Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for
me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” 

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things
I buy you?”

Apparently We are not going to make it tonight..!

0

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